Post by Draculasaurus on Feb 14, 2014 21:13:26 GMT
The TARDIS was like a rose, and like a rose it had thorns and therefore a prick.
The prick of a thorn can't go strolling off into the wintry London air whistling a tune, but that is precisely what the TARDIS's did.
"Ah, Earth!" he exclaimed smelling the air. "Smells like the 1650's maybe."
He turned and spotted a pigbin of some sort laying in the dirt, groaning.
"or maybe somewhat later." he said as he walked away.
"Out for a squeezer, aye?" mumbled a harsh and uncultured young woman's voice.
The Doctor turned to look at her.
"I'm sorry, what?" He said.
"I say, you out for a squeezer?" she replied.
"Sorry, what?" He said.
"A squeezah! Are. You. Out. For. A. Squeezah?" she hissed making a nasty jerking motion with her fist.
"Oh, aye, no! I should say not!" said the Doctor.
"What do you want then?" she said. "A mic check?"
"I'm sorry, what?" asked the Doctor.
"A mic check, Do you want a mic check?" she said slyly looking both ways down the street.
"A what? I don't know what you're saying." said the Doctor.
"Do you want for me to give you a mic check?" she said. She made a fist with one hand and tapped on the top of it with the fingers of her other hand.
"Testing one two three" she said into her fist "Is this thing on."
"OK" said the Doctor " Now I know I don't want that."
"Well what do you want?" she said exasperated. "what are you doing here?"
"I just want to help is all, that's what I do." he said.
"Ohhh" she said dramatically. "You want to help me? All right, but you're washing your hands first."
"What? No!" exclaimed the Doctor. "Not like that"
"Don't be shy." she said "Are you pretty nimble? Say that thing with the sea shells by the sea shore."
"Oh, aye! No! I don't think I really"
"That's all right" she interrupted "You've got money?"
"Actually no, I never carry money" said the Doctor. "but..."
"Oh, I should have known!" she roared "How much of my time have you wasted? eh? how much?
"but I never even wanted" he began
"By now I could have given you a mortar and pestle and had a tenner off you"
"A what?" he said
"A mortar and pestle!"
"I don't know what that means." he said desperately
She came toward him threateningly, grinding one fist into her other open hand in a circular motion.
"A Mortar. And. Pestle!" she shouted
He ran back to the TARDIS and regenerated straight into Capaldi.
The prick of a thorn can't go strolling off into the wintry London air whistling a tune, but that is precisely what the TARDIS's did.
"Ah, Earth!" he exclaimed smelling the air. "Smells like the 1650's maybe."
He turned and spotted a pigbin of some sort laying in the dirt, groaning.
"or maybe somewhat later." he said as he walked away.
"Out for a squeezer, aye?" mumbled a harsh and uncultured young woman's voice.
The Doctor turned to look at her.
"I'm sorry, what?" He said.
"I say, you out for a squeezer?" she replied.
"Sorry, what?" He said.
"A squeezah! Are. You. Out. For. A. Squeezah?" she hissed making a nasty jerking motion with her fist.
"Oh, aye, no! I should say not!" said the Doctor.
"What do you want then?" she said. "A mic check?"
"I'm sorry, what?" asked the Doctor.
"A mic check, Do you want a mic check?" she said slyly looking both ways down the street.
"A what? I don't know what you're saying." said the Doctor.
"Do you want for me to give you a mic check?" she said. She made a fist with one hand and tapped on the top of it with the fingers of her other hand.
"Testing one two three" she said into her fist "Is this thing on."
"OK" said the Doctor " Now I know I don't want that."
"Well what do you want?" she said exasperated. "what are you doing here?"
"I just want to help is all, that's what I do." he said.
"Ohhh" she said dramatically. "You want to help me? All right, but you're washing your hands first."
"What? No!" exclaimed the Doctor. "Not like that"
"Don't be shy." she said "Are you pretty nimble? Say that thing with the sea shells by the sea shore."
"Oh, aye! No! I don't think I really"
"That's all right" she interrupted "You've got money?"
"Actually no, I never carry money" said the Doctor. "but..."
"Oh, I should have known!" she roared "How much of my time have you wasted? eh? how much?
"but I never even wanted" he began
"By now I could have given you a mortar and pestle and had a tenner off you"
"A what?" he said
"A mortar and pestle!"
"I don't know what that means." he said desperately
She came toward him threateningly, grinding one fist into her other open hand in a circular motion.
"A Mortar. And. Pestle!" she shouted
He ran back to the TARDIS and regenerated straight into Capaldi.