Post by Ribs, Suthers' Pal on Nov 9, 2014 17:35:34 GMT
Hello,
This is another thing I've written for GB, this time for the latest competition where the prompt was "Write a story with a Doctor and the wrong companion." I was very tempted to write a story about Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman meeting a companion from Dr Who but I decided to do a really bizarre take on it.
The Doctor was left in a great pickle.
“You’ll never get away with this,” he boasted. “The American people will never fall for your lies.”
President Obama turned to him. “Lies? I merely seek to bring out the best in everybody.” He cackled. “Their innards, that is!”
Tied to a table in Obama’s secret lair, the Doctor could not do anything. The December Gun was primed to fire, and cause the entire world’s internal organs to spontaneously explode.
“There’s one part of your plan I do not understand, Mr. President.” He kept trying to move his hands around, to no success. “What is the purpose of the large vat of acid, or the supercomputer?”
“They are merely decoration, my friend.” The President straightened his tie. “If you do not mind, I must put Sasha and Malia to bed.” He disappeared up a staircase, leaving the Doctor to the supervision of his team of evil scientists.
The Doctor had a plan. A loose one, but still a plan. He called to one of the scientists. “Excuse me, I’m parched. Could I have a glass of water?” The man walked over.
“Television’s Matthew Perry? What?” The Doctor simply did not understand.
“I am here to rescue you. I am your companion for the day.” He cut him off of the table.
“Why? Who sent you?”
“I do not know. I simply felt an overwhelming urge that today, I would be the Doctor’s companion, even if it was wrong.” He handed the Doctor a revolver. “Just in case.”
The Doctor was a bit befuddled. “Yes, alright, I suppose. But we must stop President Obama, he wants nothing more than to harm the American people.”
The two disappeared down a corridor. “We should be able to disable the December gun with the use of an active planetarium,” Matthew Perry explained.
“Er, yes, alright, I suppose.” The Doctor said, “If Matthew Perry says so. But why?”
“Basic trigonometric theorem suggests the ratio of planetoid contact to irrefutable suppression matrices should counteract the balance of isometric comparison.” He explained.
“Oh.” the Doctor responded. “Okay.”
“We need to create a negative polar response; hence, the planetarium.”
“But surely we would need the help of some kind of celebrity astrophysicist?” inquired the Doctor.
“I know just the one.”
On the other side of the world, a scientist was working on a complex new interplanetary model. The phone suddenly rang, and they answered.
“Professor Cox here.”
“Yes, hello, this is Matthew Perry. I am saving the world today. I need you to nullify your triangulators so we can stop President Obama.”
Professor Cox grimaced. “Is this a joke?”
“No, really, it is serious. I’m here with the Doctor,” a faint greeting could be heard on the other of the line, “and President Obama is going to kill everybody in the whole world.”
“Well, alright. But only for a second. And never call me again.”
Professor Courtney Cox turned the dial.
Back at President Obama’s secret base, everything went haywire. Obama burst into the room.
“What the hell is happening?”
“I’m afraid, Mr. President, your days of tyranny are at an end.” The Doctor explained.
Obama stood, mouth agape. “Matthew Perry,” he exclaimed, “I should have known. My mortal nemesis.” He grabbed the gun out of the Doctor’s hand.
“Please, do not. If there is any good in your heart-” The Doctor began pleading as Obama pointed the barrel at Matthew Perry.
“So,” the President began, “No one told you life was going to be this way.” As the Doctor began clapping, Obama fired a series of shots.
“Matthew Perry, no!” the Doctor rushed to his side, as President Obama collapsed in exhaustion. “Please – don’t die.”
“I don’t regret any of it. Not even Go On.” He said, dying. “But – just – do one thing for me, please?”
“Anything, my dearest friend.” The Doctor could not hold back the tears, his hands covered in blood.
Matthew Perry coughed in pain. With his dying breaths, he implored, “Be sure to watch the Odd Couple on CBS.”
“From Sunday to Saturday and every day in between, my love.”
The Odd Couple stars Matthew Perry and Thomas Lennon in a sure-fire hit remake of the classic sitcom. Be sure to check it out in 2015.
This is another thing I've written for GB, this time for the latest competition where the prompt was "Write a story with a Doctor and the wrong companion." I was very tempted to write a story about Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman meeting a companion from Dr Who but I decided to do a really bizarre take on it.
The Doctor was left in a great pickle.
“You’ll never get away with this,” he boasted. “The American people will never fall for your lies.”
President Obama turned to him. “Lies? I merely seek to bring out the best in everybody.” He cackled. “Their innards, that is!”
Tied to a table in Obama’s secret lair, the Doctor could not do anything. The December Gun was primed to fire, and cause the entire world’s internal organs to spontaneously explode.
“There’s one part of your plan I do not understand, Mr. President.” He kept trying to move his hands around, to no success. “What is the purpose of the large vat of acid, or the supercomputer?”
“They are merely decoration, my friend.” The President straightened his tie. “If you do not mind, I must put Sasha and Malia to bed.” He disappeared up a staircase, leaving the Doctor to the supervision of his team of evil scientists.
The Doctor had a plan. A loose one, but still a plan. He called to one of the scientists. “Excuse me, I’m parched. Could I have a glass of water?” The man walked over.
“Television’s Matthew Perry? What?” The Doctor simply did not understand.
“I am here to rescue you. I am your companion for the day.” He cut him off of the table.
“Why? Who sent you?”
“I do not know. I simply felt an overwhelming urge that today, I would be the Doctor’s companion, even if it was wrong.” He handed the Doctor a revolver. “Just in case.”
The Doctor was a bit befuddled. “Yes, alright, I suppose. But we must stop President Obama, he wants nothing more than to harm the American people.”
The two disappeared down a corridor. “We should be able to disable the December gun with the use of an active planetarium,” Matthew Perry explained.
“Er, yes, alright, I suppose.” The Doctor said, “If Matthew Perry says so. But why?”
“Basic trigonometric theorem suggests the ratio of planetoid contact to irrefutable suppression matrices should counteract the balance of isometric comparison.” He explained.
“Oh.” the Doctor responded. “Okay.”
“We need to create a negative polar response; hence, the planetarium.”
“But surely we would need the help of some kind of celebrity astrophysicist?” inquired the Doctor.
“I know just the one.”
On the other side of the world, a scientist was working on a complex new interplanetary model. The phone suddenly rang, and they answered.
“Professor Cox here.”
“Yes, hello, this is Matthew Perry. I am saving the world today. I need you to nullify your triangulators so we can stop President Obama.”
Professor Cox grimaced. “Is this a joke?”
“No, really, it is serious. I’m here with the Doctor,” a faint greeting could be heard on the other of the line, “and President Obama is going to kill everybody in the whole world.”
“Well, alright. But only for a second. And never call me again.”
Professor Courtney Cox turned the dial.
Back at President Obama’s secret base, everything went haywire. Obama burst into the room.
“What the hell is happening?”
“I’m afraid, Mr. President, your days of tyranny are at an end.” The Doctor explained.
Obama stood, mouth agape. “Matthew Perry,” he exclaimed, “I should have known. My mortal nemesis.” He grabbed the gun out of the Doctor’s hand.
“Please, do not. If there is any good in your heart-” The Doctor began pleading as Obama pointed the barrel at Matthew Perry.
“So,” the President began, “No one told you life was going to be this way.” As the Doctor began clapping, Obama fired a series of shots.
“Matthew Perry, no!” the Doctor rushed to his side, as President Obama collapsed in exhaustion. “Please – don’t die.”
“I don’t regret any of it. Not even Go On.” He said, dying. “But – just – do one thing for me, please?”
“Anything, my dearest friend.” The Doctor could not hold back the tears, his hands covered in blood.
Matthew Perry coughed in pain. With his dying breaths, he implored, “Be sure to watch the Odd Couple on CBS.”
“From Sunday to Saturday and every day in between, my love.”
The Odd Couple stars Matthew Perry and Thomas Lennon in a sure-fire hit remake of the classic sitcom. Be sure to check it out in 2015.